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Bondage & Sexuality


January 12, 2015

Bondage Sexuality › bondage sexuality blog › female bondage blog › how to have hot sex as a parent › Sex Advice › sex myth busters › sex myths › sex myths debunked › Sexual bondage experience › Sub-Shop › sub-shop.com › subshop › what men want from sex › what women want in bed ›


Sex Myths – Debunked! The Real Inside Scoop on Sex Myths!

Sex Myths – Debunked! The Real Inside Scoop on Sex Myths!


She is holding out sex with you on purpose.
Okay guys, I know it must feel like this but I assure you chances are she is not withholding sex from you as a weapon of man destruction. (link to weapons of man destruction article – another Autumn original……hhaahahahah!) If you are not having sex, and you have initiated it and she is not responsive there is a reason why. She thinks you are being an Asshat about something. And it could be anything at all, so it is best to talk to her in a non-combatitive way about it. Rub her shoulders, give her a kiss on the cheek (okay guys, the one that is on her face, you need to get her in the mood first) and tell her how pretty she looks. Lie if you have to. We don’t care. We just need to hear it, even if we just got home from the gym, our hair is a mess and we feel like we are going to throw up.
She is not interested in having sex with you because something is going on emotionally. Find out what it is and give her the reassurance she needs. That is really what it’s all about for her right now and once she is feeling better, get ready for SEXY TIME!

Bondage is only for Kinky or Weird People
Did you know that the average person into bondage is….EVERYBODY. No, seriously. I’m not joking. Do you know how normal you really are? I would know. I am literally a nice girl. I’ve had six (not a typo SIX) lovers my entire life and I never would imagine kissing on the first date as it would seem to forward. Fast forward several very nice dates later, and I’m fishing for the handcuffs….and a few years later….a warehouse full of them. Nice people like bondage. No really, they do! Just look at you. You are visiting my site and sub-shop is all about loving bondage in a healthy, fun and sexy way that brings people closer together. So, if you are here, chances are you are a pretty decent person.
Who do I know who is into bondage: Special Education Teachers, Pastors (that’s right, I said it and it’s true, I know several that have a very happy and healthy relationship with their partner and love bondage, you would be surprised at the things I know…), Firemen, Secretaries, (that joke kind of writes itself, don’t you think with the movie and all…), Travel Agents, Doctors, Lawyers, Your Neighbor. Seriously, I firmly believe that there are more people than you would ever expect or suspect into bondage sex. So, get over it, and enjoy. You are completely normal! And probably happier than most people because you get better aftershocks. (you’re welcome!)

Penis Size Matters
Nope! Not at all. How great your ass looks in those jeans or watching you do pull ups matters to us. Can you fix something without your shirt on? Thank you. I speak for all women when I say we would like that VERY MUCH. Guys tend to think that penis size really matters to girls because they obsess over it, they talk about it, they joke about it, they insult with it. But not us. We really don’t care how big your penis is, as long as you use it. For most women, making out and getting “there” is the best part. The clitoris, G-spot and entrance to the vagina are her going to be her “OH MY GOD” spots. Also, please keep in mind that most women don’t orgasm by penetration alone, clitoral stimulation will lead her to biggest orgasms during intercourse. If she is not climaxing, it might be because she needs that extra bit of stimulation which a good vibrator(INSERT LINK) can absolutely help with. It has nothing to do with your penis size, it’s all about how you use your entire body during sex.

Only Women Fake Orgasms
Ladies are you in for a shock or what? Men fake orgasms too! Why do men fake orgasms you say? For the same reasons you do. They are tired, distracted, not feeling good, etc. They still want to be with you sexually it’s well….they really want to be done now. According to an unofficial pole (oh. I meant Poll….*smile*) of my girlfriends and many wonderful gay and straight guy friends, it’s actually often because either a part of their body hurts from fucking you too hard, or they are overheated.


How do you stop fake orgasms? Well, there are a few different things you can try. Put a large fan in your room. Chances are you already have one if you have a guy in your life because they are always hot while we are always cold. ( I know what you are thinking….God has a sick sense of humor…and please turn down the air conditioning or up if you are a guy) Men tend to get overheated during sex. When you think about it, when you do it right it’s a lot of exercise. So, he may have pulled a muscle or just be overheated in general. Do not let it get to your ego. Be happy that your man cares enough to let you know he enjoys it, even if that “exact” orgasm is not happening right now. Fellas, the same thing goes for you. If she is faking it, or you suspect she is, it’s not because she is not enjoying it, it just may take a little more time to get her there. Women are like crockpots, you kind of have to let us simmer. Stroke the heat all day, and see what happens…*FIREWORKS*…. And that goes for both men and women.

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Bondage & Fetish Interest Checklist - Find out what you and your partner are really into!

Bondage & Fetish Activities Experience

 

A frequent request brought this wonderful Bondage & Fetish Checklist back.  I encourage you to print it out and share it with your partner.  Make one for you and one for them....then compare. You might find some wonderful new "activities" to do tonight...and tomorrow..and the next day...and the next day...  

 

Yes/No Interest Level
0-5

Rate your interest level accordingly:

Interest Level 1-5
• Level 1: Not at all interested
• Level 2: Not my thing, but if you like it, I could be open to it
• Level 3: Kind of interested in it
• Level 4: Interested in it
• Level 5: Yes! Yes! Yes!

 

Abrasion
Adult Movies (watching)
Adult Movies (making)
Age play
Anal sex
Anal plugs (small)
Anal plugs (large)
Anal plug (public, under clothes)
Anal Plug (vibrating)
Armbinders
Asphyxiation
Blindfolds
Being serviced (sexual)
Being bitten
Biting
Bondage Tape
Boot worship
Bondage (light)
Bondage (heavy)
Bondage (multi-day)
Bondage (public, under clothing)
Bondage Erotic (reading)
Bondage Erotica (writing)
Breast/chest bondage
Breast whipping
Crops / Caning
Chastity belts
Chastity Cages (for him)
Clothespins
Cock worship
Cock Rings
Collars (worn in private)
Collars (worn in public)
Corsets (wearing)
Cross Dressing
Cuffs (leather)
Cuffs (metal)
Double penetration
Electro Stimulation / Tens Unit
Electro Stimulation / Dildos
Electro Stimulation / Plugs
Enforced chastity
Exhibitionism
Eye contact restrictions
Face slapping
Fantasy abandonment
Fantasy role play
Fisting
Floggers
Following orders
Foot worship
Forced Feminization
Forced homosexuality
Forced masturbation
Forced Orgasms
Forced servitude
Full head hoods
Gags (cloth)
Gags (rubber)
Gags (tape)
Gags (ball)
Gates of Hell (male)
Genital sex
Glass Sex Toys
Hair pulling
Hand jobs (giving)
Hand jobs (receiving)
Handcuffs
Harems (serving w/other subs)
Harnessing (leather)
Harnessing (rope)
Having food chosen for you
Having clothing chosen for you
Head (giving fellatio)
Head (receiving fellatio)
High heel worship
Hot wax
Humiliation
Ice cubes
Kidnapping Fantasy
Kneeling
Latex Clothing
Latex Bondage
Leather clothing
Leather restraints
Manacles & Steel Irons
Massage (giving)
Massage (receiving)
Medical scenes
Modeling for erotic photos
Mouth bits
Nipple clamps
Nipple weights
Over-the-knee spanking
Orgasm denial
Orgasm control
Outdoor scenes
Outdoor sex
Phone sex
Penis Pumps (stimulators)
Pony Play Slave
Posture Collars
Prostate Stimulation
Pussy/cock whipping
Pussy worship
Restrictive rules on behavior
Riding crops
Rubber/latex clothing
Rope body harness
Rope for bondage play
Saran wrapping
Scratching - getting
Scratching - giving
Sensory deprivation
Serving
Serving as furniture
Serving as a maid
Serving orally (sexual)
Serving other doms (supervised)
Serving other doms (unsupervised)
Sexual deprivation (short term)
Sexual deprivation (long term)
Sex Swing
Shaving (body hair)
Shaving (head hair)
Sleep deprivation
Sleepsacks
Slutty clothing (private)
Slutty clothing (public)
Spanking
Spandex clothing
Speech restrictions (when, what)
Speculums (Anal)
Speculums (vaginal)
Spreader bars
Standing in corner
Stocks
Straight jackets
Strap-on-dildos (sucking on)
Strap-on-dildos (penetrated by)
Strap-on-dildos (wearing)
Strapping (full body beating)
Suspension (upright)
Suspension (inverted)
Suspension (horizontal)
Swallowing semen
Swapping (with one other couple)
Swinging (multiple couples)
Tattooing
Teasing
Tickling
Uniforms
Including others
Vaginal dildo
Verbal humiliation
Vibrator on genitals
Voyeurism (watching others)
Voyeurism (your Dom w/others)
Water torture
Wearing symbolic jewelry
Whipping (soft)
Whipping (hard)
Wooden paddles



So, now that you have all these wonderful ideas, what will you do with them?!  I can think of a few things...and they all start with O.  As in my Oh my God, OH Don't Stop, OHHH...OHHH... You can fill in the rest.  However, if you gag them..it will be more like..MMHHHHHPHH... The choice is yours.  What will you do with this new super power?  Will you use it for Good or Evil?  The choice is up to you!

 

PS - And please ask your Co-Workers to stop sending me emails about you whistling at your desk.  You are happy. I get it.  But the 5th time of Blow My Whistle is a bit much....why not change it to It's a Small World?  Everybody loves that...

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The Four Benefits of Bondage for Married Couples

 

Marriage is one of the most beautiful things in life that could ever happen to you, so they say, but somehow you question yourself if this was ever true. What once was cute and adorable when you were still girlfriend-boyfriend no longer holds true as you find the same annoying, irritating, irksome and most of the time leaves you out gasping for air.

Aside from exasperating dealings with your spouse, your list of things to worry about could fall flat in your face thus making your responsibilities more dramatic. You suddenly think about the kids you need to take care of, a career you need to hold on to, vexing bills and loans to pay, and these worries could drain the energy out of you. And then you lay flat in bed at night wondering if things could get any better for you and your supposed-to-be happy married life.

Now why don’t you come to a decisive conclusion and decide what’s best for your marriage to preserve its glorious years? You might be surprised with this, but bondage or BDSM as they call it, attracts millions of married couples and their stories are life-changing. So before you do another load of laundry or file that report for work, why not consider jumping into the waters and feel the erotic rush of bondage?

1. Bondage solidifies trust issues among married couples.

Trust is one of the most important foundations for a marriage to last a lifetime. As adults, you and your spouse need to establish this in the beginning, and when trust issues resurface, your married life might begin to crumble if you don’t resolve them ASAP.

Bondage creates a continuing trust relationship with your partner as either of you puts your complete trusts in the hands of the other. You bear the sensual pain of a good over the knee spanking, an erotic bondage whipping, being tightly restrained with straps and blindfolded but these won’t be an issue at all if you have a rock solid trust with your partner. Even if you do trust him, still bondage strengthens this bond as you allow yourself to become vulnerable and submissive to his commands. You allow him to put you under his complete trust and care, unaware of what he might he do next while deliciously anticipating his next move, touch, kiss or caress.



2. Bondage allows you to keep the fire burning.

Going out on fancy dinners, watching movies together, spending lazy Sunday afternoons with your better half are good ways to keep the romance burning, but mind you, bondage also does the same thing. Just in a much more intense and erotic fashion. The only difference is that BDSM gives you and your partner unrestricted freedom to do whatever it takes to sexually pleasure and dominant your partner while the other remains submissive waiting not so patiently for what comes next.

BDSM allows couple to keep their sexual escapades sexy, foxy and tempting but adding a little more twist, zing, spice and everything nice on top of it. Bondage is a sure-fire way to ignite the fire and keep it burning because couples get a chance to experiment their love making sessions. Couples can go as far as using ball gags, leather leash and collar kits, restraints, mouth muzzles and the like. These BDSM equipments can instantly liven up your senses thus making your bondage sessions more exciting, stimulating and sexually arousing.


3. Bondage gives you a thousandfold of erotic feelings all at the same time.

BDSM is an erotic and sexually intoxicating lovemaking session that could send a thousand number of sensations in different parts of your body. In turn, you feel a satiable and palatable sexual craving with your partner that only heightens as emotional and the most amazing orgasms of your life come forward.

If you want to take it a step forward, you can always introduce sexy hot new bondage gear in with your love making or bondage sex. Soft sexy rope, blindfolds, wrist cuffs, ballgags, bondage tape and more are just some of the great gear and sexy toys you can add to your love making.
With the different uses of various bondage fear, you can greatly enhance your sexual experience by giving yourself and your lover even more sensual and erotic possibilities. Although you can also satisfy one‘s sexual hunger with just one stroke or two. Use ties and ropes to caress and fondle your partner’s most sensitive parts until they feel the pleasure building up inside them, almost spilling out. Or why don’t you use an ostrich tickler to stroke and titillate your partner as you move it up and down their tender parts as they beg for more. These are fun ways to heat things up.

4. Bondage opens up a different horizon where partners can learn from each other.

Bondage opens up a number of doors for you and your partner. This means that, during your hot passionate bondage sessions, you discover new and deliciously erotic things about each other. It could be that your partner wants you to talk dirty with him as he rubs his thing inside your threshold or how he loves to hear you moan and beg for mercy. These experiences allow you to make up for those ho-hum moments during the day and in turn please him the way he wants to be pleased. Or it could be the other way around. Your partner might discover that you like to be touched and caressed in this manner or that you love the kinky idea out of role playing.

The benefits of bondage for a married couple are that they keep things spicy and sexy. Hot monogamy is the best monogamy. And remember monogamy doesn’t have to be monogamous. So spice up your sex life by letting go and exploring the sensual side of you with bondage.

Continue Reading >

Sex Myths – Debunked! The Real Inside Scoop on Sex Myths!

 

 

Anyone who has ever picked up a magazine....has read about a Sex Myth.  Cosmopolitan wants to tell us what you are really thinking and how to decode the "secret guy" language, Maxim wants to tell you how to get laid more, and Good Housekeeping makes you never want to have sex again....(or wait...maybe that is just me)   .

 

But I, Autumn LeFleur am going to debunk those Sexy Myths right now.....

 

She is holding out sex with you on purpose.


Okay guys, I know it must feel like this but I assure you chances are she is not withholding sex from you as a weapon of man destruction. (link to weapons of man destruction article – another Autumn original……hhaahahahah!) If you are not having sex, and you have initiated it and she is not responsive there is a reason why. She thinks you are being an Asshat about something. And it could be anything at all, so it is best to talk to her in a non-combatitive way about it. Rub her shoulders, give her a kiss on the cheek (okay guys, the one that is on her face, you need to get her in the mood first) and tell her how pretty she looks. Lie if you have to. We don’t care. We just need to hear it, even if we just got home from the gym, our hair is a mess and we feel like we are going to throw up.


She is not interested in having sex with you because something is going on emotionally. Find out what it is and give her the reassurance she needs. That is really what it’s all about for her right now and once she is feeling better, get ready for SEXY TIME!

Bondage is only for Kinky or Weird People


Did you know that the average person into bondage is….EVERYBODY. No, seriously. I’m not joking. Do you know how normal you really are? I would know. I am literally a nice girl. I’ve had six (not a typo SIX) lovers my entire life and I never would imagine kissing on the first date as it would seem to forward. Fast forward several very nice dates later, and I’m fishing for the handcuffs….and a few years later….a warehouse full of them. Nice people like bondage. No really, they do! Just look at you. You are visiting my site and sub-shop is all about loving bondage in a healthy, fun and sexy way that brings people closer together. So, if you are here, chances are you are a pretty decent person.


Who do I know who is into bondage: Special Education Teachers, Pastors (that’s right, I said it and it’s true, I know several that have a very happy and healthy relationship with their partner and love bondage, you would be surprised at the things I know…), Firemen, Secretaries, (that joke kind of writes itself, don’t you think with the movie and all…), Travel Agents, Doctors, Lawyers, Your Neighbor. Seriously, I firmly believe that there are more people than you would ever expect or suspect into bondage sex. So, get over it, and enjoy. You are completely normal! And probably happier than most people because you get better aftershocks. (you’re welcome!)

Penis Size Matters


Nope! Not at all. How great your ass looks in those jeans or watching you do pull ups matters to us. Can you fix something without your shirt on? Thank you. I speak for all women when I say we would like that VERY MUCH. Guys tend to think that penis size really matters to girls because they obsess over it, they talk about it, they joke about it, they insult with it. But not us.

We really don’t care how big your penis is, as long as you use it. For most women, making out and getting “there” is the best part. The clitoris, G-spot and entrance to the vagina are her going to be her “OH MY GOD” spots. Also, please keep in mind that most women don’t orgasm by penetration alone, clitoral stimulation will lead her to biggest orgasms during intercourse. If she is not climaxing, it might be because she needs that extra bit of stimulation which a good vibrator can absolutely help with. It has nothing to do with your penis size, it’s all about how you use your entire body during sex.

Only Women Fake Orgasms


Ladies are you in for a shock or what? Men fake orgasms too! Why do men fake orgasms you say? For the same reasons you do. They are tired, distracted, not feeling good, etc. They still want to be with you sexually it’s well….they really want to be done now. According to an unofficial pole (oh. I meant Poll….*smile*) of my girlfriends and many wonderful gay and straight guy friends, it’s actually often because either a part of their body hurts from fucking you too hard, or they are overheated.


How do you stop fake orgasms? Well, there are a few different things you can try. Put a large fan in your room. Chances are you already have one if you have a guy in your life because they are always hot while we are always cold. ( I know what you are thinking….God has a sick sense of humor…and please turn down the air conditioning or up if you are a guy) Men tend to get overheated during sex. When you think about it, when you do it right it’s a lot of exercise. So, he may have pulled a muscle or just be overheated in general. Do not let it get to your ego. Be happy that your man cares enough to let you know he enjoys it, even if that “exact” orgasm is not happening right now. Fellas, the same thing goes for you. If she is faking it, or you suspect she is, it’s not because she is not enjoying it, it just may take a little more time to get her there. Women are like crockpots, you kind of have to let us simmer. Stroke the heat all day, and see what happens…*FIREWORKS*…. And that goes for both men and women.

 

And now that you have all this information what will you do with it?  Will you use your power for good or for evil.....*wink*  Perhaps Both! *giggles*

 

 

Continue Reading >

June 02, 2014


Random Sex Facts - Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex But Were Afraid to Ask

Random Sex Facts - Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex But Were Afraid to Ask


The Ancient Romans used a plant called Silphium as a method of contraception. They were so sexually active as a society that they drove the plant into extinction. Wouldn’t you hate to be the last guy who picked the last plant? The entire CULTURE would be mad at you, and very sexually frustrated at the same time. Not a good combo….

Oculolinctus is the act of licking a partner’s eyeball for sexual arousal. This gives a whole new meaning to Eyes Wide Shut!

Women who play video games tend to have more sex and be happier with their relationships than those who don’t. This “supposed fact” was brought to you by the Games Blog at AOL. And every single guy in the world. So, shut up and grab a controller, he’s feeling 17 again and it’s going to be a good night!

According to a 2010 Fox News report, Pakistan had outranked all countries in Google searches for pornographic terms that year. Narrowing the analytics for the search term to just 2011, Pakistan maintained the number one position, followed by India and Vietnam. Almost kind of makes you kind of want to go there…..*almost*…….

Premature ejaculation affects approximately one quarter of adult males, and that the average act of sexual intercourse lasts 4-8 minutes. I, however happen to be of the thought, that it is the ultimate compliment.

Japan has officially organized the world’s biggest ORGY, including 500 people having sex at one place. The event involved 250 women and a corresponding number of guys who started their sexual act at the same place and time. Wondering what room could house such a big number of people? Well, it all went down in a warehouse complete with a professional filming crew recording the whole event and taking photos. This is why the Japanese are beating us in everything lately. First it was math, then the rest of school and now sex……really…we need to pick it up here, people……


A prostitute is more likely to have a Police Officer as a customer, than to be arrested by one. According to Business professor Steven D. Levitt and Sudhir Alladi Venkatesh of Columbia University, “purely academic” *cough* *cough* study finds estimates that prostitutes are arrested only once in every 450 tricks, but only one in ten of these arrests will lead to a prison sentence. Only one john is arrested for every 1,200 tricks. They also estimated that about one in 30 tricks performed by a prostitute is a freebie to the police in return for avoiding arrest.


Male dolphins have been known to keep females hostage and not feed them until the female agrees to have sex with them. The overall impression we have of dolphins is that they are cute, intelligent and very friendly. While this is all true, dolphins have needs too!


Dolphins are known to be very promiscuous creatures and differ from many other animals in that they engage in sex for fun. Females can have sex with multiple males in a single day while males may gang up and take a female hostage before taking turns to ravish her. We just hope that they woo’d her first, bought her some flowers and had some really good lube. And Chocolate. It’s a well known fact that dolphins love chocolates….oh…and Red vines…oh wait…are we still talking about Dolphins…awkward….

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