The first step is to discuss with your partner what you will be doing and why. If you are doing it as punishment, be clear about why it’s happening. If it’s something you wish to explore or try, “no reason at all”, you should also let them know beforehand. Once you have talked about it, make sure to choose a safe word in case it gets to intense and one of you wants to stop. When all of that is taken care of, you can go to the deed itself wink*:
- Decide how you will be performing the spanking. You can do it by hand, crop, paddle or whip. It will depend on what you want to achieve with it or yours/your partner’s preferences.
- You will also need to decide if you will spank them bared bottom or with their clothes on and how many spanks they will receive. You can also count them or make them count out loud when you are doing it.
- Make them place themselves where you will be doing the spanking. You can place them up your lap with you sitting on the bed so they can rest their upper body somewhere comfortable; you can also make them stand up and lean over a wall or bend them over a chair or table.
- Remember to take off any rings, watches or bracelets because they may hurt your partner.
- You can also restrict your partner, by tying their arms together for instance if you two feel they will squirm or move a lot…or you can tie them just because, you don’t need a reason, right? Wink*
- You should only spank over the fleshiest part of the buttocks. If you want to move lower, only go to the part where the upper thighs connect with the butt. A spanking on the back of the upper thighs, knees and tailbone are really painful, so you should avoid them.
- When you are ready, take a deep breath and relax. Count to three and lift your arm about halfway (from the elbow down) and land it square and clean in the buttocks. You can alternate between the right and the left cheek, do it randomly or right in the center; just be careful not to hit the areas mentioned above. And always keep in mind how hard you are hitting them, so measure your strength accordingly.
- When you are done, you must offer care and support to your partner. Talk about how you both felt during the process and what parts would you change/keep, etc. The idea is for this to be something you two enjoy and an activity that makes your relationship stronger and better. Hold your partner and give them a soothing massage afterwards! They will likely be sore, so a massage with some lotion or oils will do the trick, wink*.