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BDSM From a Distance

Long distance relationships are hard. Sometimes it can seem like keeping it together is near impossible. The hardest part of any long distance pairing is the intimacy that can sometimes be lacking when you are separated by state, or sometimes country, borders. This is especially true when you are talking about those of us in BDSM relationships. 

For the average person a quick webcam session can at least give you some of the sexual side of your partner that you are missing. But what if you are sub and he’s a dom or vice versa? Is it possible for you to maintain that BDSM lifestyle when you are so far apart? Actually, yes it is.

Master and I have been separated a few times and we’ve learned through trial and error that we can still maintain that same relationship when he’s away. So I thought I’d share some tips and tricks for those of you that encounter the same circumstances. We did not explore all of them, but some are on our list for the next time.

  1. Self-bondage

Most have heard of this even if they haven’t tried it. Self-bondage is something that comes in handy for the sub that doesn’t have a current partner. Or, in this case, has a partner that isn’t nearby. It is exactly what the name implies. The sub will bind themselves for sexual pleasure.

 

Obviously the possibilities for self-bondage sex are more limited than for typical bondage sex. Being alone you will need to be able to use some of your body parts in order to enjoy the experience. But it is still possible to bind yourself and have a little fun.

Bondage tape is the ideal choice as it is easy to put on and remove. It can bind you tighter than you might get from other materials. So grab a roll or two and hook up the webcam. Your dom can easily instruct you on how and where to place the tape and you can both enjoy a thrilling experience.

  1. Role Playing

BDSM is all about role play and that can still be carried out even when you are apart. You just adapt the scene to what is possible. You can create a scene or allow the dom to do so. Determine what roles you are going to play and carry out the entire scenario in your head. Doing this via video or webcam is a great idea as it involves both partners. Making a sexy video of what you were instructed to do and send it back showing that you are still playing the role of the sub.

  1. Toys and gadgets

Just because your partner isn’t with you doesn’t mean those toys and gadgets have to go to waste. Pull them out for use with your partner from a distance. He can tell you what he’d like to see and you can carry it out. You can surprise him with a photo or video of you. 

The hardest part of maintaining a BDSM relationship from a distance is to keep the roles intact. When you aren’t with each other it is harder to maintain the dominant and submissive sides. Your conversations become about every day life. Your role in the day to day becomes a person in charge. It’s easy to forget to slip back into your normal routine when you do talk.

That is why its imperative that you allow time for the roleplay. He may have you spank yourself or even gag yourself. DO it. Don’t fall away from the same roles that you have when you are together. And of course, make sure that you visit regularly so that you can enact these scenes face to face.