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BDSM Principles You Need to Know About

 

There are three basic principles in BDSM community - Safe, Sane and Consensual (SSC). All participants in a BDSM play must agree to these three principles of guidance and relationship activities in order to avoid any undesired situation. These three principles include –

Safe – All participants must discuss their health conditions with each other and gain a full understanding of safety guidelines and reach to an agreement.

Sane – BDSM plays can get pretty rough, so participants must carry out all activities in a sane and sensible frame of mind.

Consensual – All activities must be performed under the full consent of participants.

These are the most basic and common principles and therefore must be followed. Some of the other guidelines of ethical BDSM are –

Aim at excellence. Because if not, then what’s the point, right? The more you give, the more you are going to get from your partner. You have to be willing to do it. You have to be passionate. Passion is contagious.

Be honest. Honesty is a big part of our lives. It’s a big part of BDSM too. Intimacy is a hard thing without honesty. Don’t promise what you can’t deliver. Aside from all the roleplays, costumes and masks, don’t try act like someone you are not.

Never harm your partner. Giving or receiving agreed amount of pain is okay. But never exceed your limits, or you might end up getting hurt and damage yourself, which will diminish your ability to function properly. Same thing applies for your partner too.

Don’t be a bully. Do not cause or accept pain unintentionally. After all, it’s all a play and you are the artist. Pain in BDSM should be a deliberate transaction for all participants.

Respect your partner. Many types of action will take place during the play. You can be the master, you can be the slave, you can tie down and spank your submissive, call names etc. But when the play is over and you are back to reality, no one is vulnerable or unworthy of respect.

Take responsibility. When it comes to responsibilities, it doesn’t matter whether you are a top or a bottom. If your partner gets unintentionally injured, seek medical help immediately. A submissive might not be able to speak up or use any safe words if she is in subspace.

Use proper accessories. Use gadgets that are specially designed for BDSM. Sterilize anal plugs, dildos, vibrators and other accessories. Use your whips and paddles according to your preferences.

Never hide anything to your partner. If you have any medical, physical or mental health condition, inform your partner immediately.

Be careful about your and your partner’s triggers. If you have psychological or emotional trigger points, discuss it with your partner beforehand.  Ask the same from your partner.

Stay away from your partner’s personal matters. Never bring your partner’s family, work or other personal affairs into the play, unless your partner wants you to.

Finish what you started. It’s never a good idea to leave your job in the middle. This can be extremely annoying for your partner. Before starting a play, ask yourself if you can do it.

All’s well that ends well. If you and your partner are not satisfied, or if you leave your partner wanting to do it again, then the session wasn’t right. At the end of a good session all participants should be relaxed and satisfied.

Don’t forget about BDSM aftercare. Submissive will need a good aftercare after the session. Take all necessary steps for aftercare.

Each and every principle of BDSM focuses on one thing, safety of all participants. The line between what you can do and can’t do gets thinner in BDSM. Every participant in BDSM must practice proper caution. If you get deep into the play, your body might not be able to respond accurately to pain and intense sensations. In situations like these, participants have to rely on each other’s judgements. So, be someone your partner can rely on, and vice versa.