When my friends were dreaming of Prince Charming and their happily ever after, I was fantasizing about handcuffs and blindfolds. Not much has changed in my world since those early days. I was about 10 the first time I realized that the idea of bondage enticed me, but it wasn't until I was 20 that I experienced my first taste of it and it was very mild. Still, I was hooked.
People always wonder what it is about BDSM and bondage specifically that appeals to me. I find it funny to be asked because I don't frequently question vanillas about their own reasons for their sexual preferences. But, if I am to be fair, how will someone know this is what they want to experience if they never ask questions. They may not be fortunate enough to have the guy they like tackle them to the bed with their hands held firmly above their head to make them realize that some things are just better than others.
Not that my story is anything like that.
Seriously though, bondage is something I'd recommend to anyone. The problem is that not everyone would like it. Master, for example, does not like being bound. He prefers his position of domination and maintaining sexual control and losing it would go against our roles.
That said, those who feel they might be interested seem to want more information. What does it feel like? Why do you like it? What should we use? Do you have to blindfolded and gagged as well?
I always find it funny to get so many questions. I've never even considered asking a vanilla why they prefer what they prefer. It always just struck me as either lack of adventure or a preference for what I find mundane. Yet, to them it is exciting the way bondage rope, ball gags and leather blindfolds are to me. So I try not to judge.
The simple answer to what it feels like is fabulous. For someone like myself, being bound is the ultimate in submission. You have an inability to move, no control over what is going to occur and no particular way to change the outcome. I love it!. The anticipation that comes with awaiting Master's choices are almost enough to drive me over the edge, in a good way.
I am there, bound and often blindfolded and gagged, and waiting not so patiently to find out what he will do from moment to moment. Will it be hands, mouth, toys or something else that he chooses to utilize? I have no control and that is part that appeals to me. I am placing every ounce of my trust into this partner and allowing him complete power over my body. Nothing on earth appeals to me more.
As far as bondage gear goes, that is also a distinctly personal sexual preference. Some days I prefer handcuffs or chains because the slight pain is also tantalizing to me. Other times, silk scarves and smooth ties work just as well. Everyone has their own preference. You may want to start simple with a guy holding your wrists above your head. If you are like the 20 year old version of me and find that this makes you want to attack him sexually, bondage might be an idea for you. How you do it is up to you. There is no rule book. I like the gagging and blindfolding because I like complete loss of control. You may feel differently. Try it in baby steps and see what you like and don't like. It's not for everyone, but it certainly should be!