When you know what your submissive likes, playtime can start! Bondage can come in so many shapes and varieties; it’s hard to limit them down to just a few. But you can definitely find inspiration in some macro general ideas and that is the whole point.
Just as dominants have different interests and things that arouse them, or simply things or aspects they enjoy the most, subs certainly aren’t any different. It’s impossible to put all subs into the same category; each and every one of them has different things they genuinely love.
So, in order to really enjoy your scene and get the most out of play time, you need to figure out what BDSM or type of bondage they love. I know you can’t label people…in life, I mean. Because when it comes to this world, labels can definitely be put to great effect. And they also tend to be welcomed! Because labels help to narrow down what are the specific things someone enjoys.
As a dominant, you will probably need to get a little creative coming up with scenes and play scenarios. Those fantasies can be adapted to your particular sub, depending what they like specifically. But as they say, before you actually get to do something wonderful, you first need wonderful ideas. Wasn’t a great thinker who said that? Isn’t that common knowledge? Wink*
You just need a little imagination to come up with great or interesting ideas. Then, you will need to adapt these ideas depending on what your particular (or your subs!) brand of BDSM looks like. But sometimes, especially if you’re starting out, it can feel a bit overwhelming because you don’t have that many ideas. That is why I hope these words help shine some light into things.
- If your submissive gets its joy from pain, you need to be careful. As they crave pain, it can be easy to let things get out of hand; you will need to be extra careful to play safely with them.
Some subs like to be restricted when they are receiving pain, but others don’t really pay that much attention to it; restriction tends to be secondary here. Depending on the person, some love to for the dom to hit them with something in particular, like a cane or a whip.
Frequently, sex is not really that important for them and sometimes its not even included in the scene. Like I mentioned, the dom that plays with them needs to be extra careful, so if you are starting out with BDSM, it may be a good idea to leave them to someone more experienced. When dealing with pain junkies, experienced doms work the best, just because inflicting pain that doesn’t actually damage anything is really tricky.
- For those subs that crave intense experiences, bondage can be a great place to make them experience new things. They have very wide tastes, just because “pushing things to the limit and having intense experiences” varies so much from person to person.
Some play ideas that may be helpful when you are dealing with them can be something like multiple orgasms, milking the prostate, edging or even chastity can work well for them. Sensory depravation or even electro stimulation can sometimes be preferred as well. They usually expect and like at least one orgasm per session, so prepare accordingly wink*.