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How to do a BDSM Collaring Ceremony

You may have heard about collaring ceremonies before, but chances are you probably haven’t been to one… yet, wink*. Or maybe you have not heard about it before. Well, thinking about a collaring ceremony being similar to a wedding helps a lot. After all, both are ceremonies where a permanent commitment is made between two people. In this case, it’s between a dominant and a submissive that decide to make their partnership official (see? Just like a wedding) A mild difference? Instead of putting a ring on it, you will put a collar in it, wink*. And the promises exchanged will probably a bit different, but in essence both ceremonies are quite alike.

The dominant and the submissive will make vows to one other, usually the promise love, commitment and support. And the collar gets put in place as a symbol of their consent and as a physical representation of the vows and promises they have made.

Depending on the couple, the attire can range between nothing at all to a more elaborate and formal wear, it will all depend on the couple’s personality and the nature of the ceremony. Some women choose to wear elegant and long gowns that represent their personality, others go for fun cocktails dresses. If the ceremony is a private affair, some even prefer to go with nothing at all, representing the consensual nature of the collaring and as a way to “give themselves bare literally” to their dominant. Some submissives even carry a bouquet, usually a single white rose as a symbol of submission (bet you didn’t know that one, right? Wink*). As for the dominant, they can also go nude or with latex or leather outfits…Or they can dress just as formal if they choose.

These ceremonies are carried out basically anywhere the couple’s wishes. If it’s a more formal affair, usually decorations are being put out. Some choose to do it in a garden, for example. The threes get decorated with lights and the surroundings are decorated with flower petals, just to give you an idea of how beautiful the places can be.

The submissive usually joins the dominant, which is waiting near to a table with a box. The dominant asks the submissive to join them and then the vows are exchanged. They are particular to the couple, but usually is something along the lines of “I will offer you my collar as a symbol of your submission. Will you accept it?” The submissive accepts and then the master puts the collar into place. Now, more words can be said, saying what is it they like about the other and the reasons why they are choosing to carry out the ceremony, as well as the expectations for the future. I should mention some couples even have someone carry out the ceremony, like an officiate to guide them through. It is not legally binding or anything, but it definitely adds a nice touch, if the couple chooses to do so. As for the collar, the dominant usually has a collar made out especially for the occasion. They commonly design them themselves; they can incorporate motives and items (like engravings or jewelry) that have some significance to the couple.

After the collar is put into place, the submissive usually kneels as a symbol of submission. The dominant then proceeds to lock the collar. The click will be a symbol of the vows and words they have just exchanged; they are for each other. Afterwards, the guests (if it’s not a private ceremony) congratulate the couple on their union. Now, what happens next will once again depend on the couple and the type of collaring ceremony. Some people choose to celebrate with a low key affair, like a toast and maybe a nice dinner. Others choose to go all out with a full blown out party, full of dancing and drinking. While others just go for a little playtime alone (or with others) to commemorate the day.

Whatever the couple chooses, the important thing is the vows being exchanged and the commitment being made, everything else will be secondary. I bet years later down the road, the thing that will come in your mind as you think of that day will be the look your master (or submissive!) had on when the collar was put into place. Now, a toast for the lovely couple!