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How to Tie Up Your Lover

Tying people up is always fun. Well, tying people up and then having your wicked way with them is 10 times more fun actually. But as we all know, in theory a lot of things are fun…doing them is something else…especially if you are not sure how to do it because you are a beginner. And it’s ok, not a single one of us was born knowing how to tie someone, and that’s what we will be learning on today’s lesion.

Before binding someone, it’s important to be clear with the person and talk about the activities and body parts they wouldn’t mind getting tied up. Talk with them and discuss the activities you’d like to do and what is off limits for them and for you. If it’s their first time or your first time, it’s still a good idea to talk about the expectations and what are you are interested in trying. The important thing will be to go slow in order to see the reactions during the whole playtime session, wink*. And it’s always imperative to have a safe word when you are playing to ensure things don’t get out of hand. I will suggest not making that word “stop” because sometimes during intense play you can say that but not really mean it. It’s better to use something else, unrelated, to create awareness that you actually want to stop and are not having fun. This could be anything like “tree” or “red” or whatever you want, just make sure both parties are aware of the same word. Just remember talking and communicating often during the session is key to the enjoyment.

Now that we have that part cleared up, let’s get to the fun part: ropes. Usually the best ropes for this are cotton or silk because they don’t move around much once they are in place. Remember, if this is something you enjoy, don’t be afraid to invest in good quality rope that adjusts to your need. Think about it as you would to a hobby, like getting some good gulf clubs for example (just a million times more fun, in my humble opinion wink*) The good thing about ropes is they are versatile. This means you can use them to tie wrists, ankles, and legs, create your own harness or maybe using it as a flogger?

Ok, so let’s review a technique, shall we? This method works for wrists, or ankles or wrists to ankles or ankles to bed or wrists to bed (lovely visuals, wink*):

You will need to place their limbs, in this case I will illustrate with ankles, with some two hands of space between them. Place the rope over the ankles; the rope should be between them. You will them proceed to wrap each end around five times.

Afterwards, cross the rope beneath the ankle cuffs. You can then take them up and around from where they begun. It should be placed like this: the back rope over the front and the other way around. Then, wrap each end around the ankles; you can stop when there’s still a small slit between the rope and the skin. If they look too loose, move the sides in the direction you were looping them to make it tighter. It should look like an equal number of loops on each side. To finish things up, pick up the last loop and place it on the circle from inside out. Repeat on the other side. Pull on both sides to secure it and tuck the ends into the wrap. Or if there is a lot of rope left, maybe tie them to somewhere else, wink*?

Before getting on to the fun, keep in mind these safety tips:

  • Always keep the rope loose enough you can get at least two fingers between the skin and you. If it’s too tight, it may restrict circulation and that is a big no. If there are chances the rope gets wet (you never know!) keep it a bit looser than that.
  • I don’t think I need to tell you this, but I will anyway: never restrict someone’s ability to breathe!
  • Don’t leave someone that is tied up alone, emergencies can occur. And that leads me to mention: always keep a set of scissors nearby, in case of emergency. Usually calmly removing the ropes works, but keep the scissors close just in case.

Keep in mind the person’s circulation at all times. If you notice any change in the limb’s colors, release them immediately. And also, tell them to inform you if the feel any numbness or that pins and needles sensation.