When did you first realize you were into bondage?
Sometime at the age of 13 when I saw a PG-13 movie with a women bound and gagged with her arms tied overhead with beautiful shaved underarms but not naked. At the age of 13 I was very excited by that image and as a teenager I always looked for movies on TV that recreated this first image. As an adult I am instantly aroused by an image of a naked women bound and gagged arms tied overhead. In college, I experimented with self-bondage without a partner.
I would describe myself more as a switch but have a strong preference for the more submissive masochistic side. For me the experience of being tightly bound and gagged, sexually "tortured" is very stimulating and its an experience that I want to repeat as often as possible! Though being the dom sometimes is a lot of fun too. Just makes it more interesting.
Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional? (please elaborate)
There are 2 activities in my life that allow me complete freedom: BDSM and running outdoors. In that sense, there is an emotional component. Bondage allows complete escape from everyday life and during a session my mind is flooded with sexual imagery. That state of mind is liberating. As for the physical aspect, there is nothing more intense for me than to be tightly bound and gagged, cross-dressed, whipped, with nipple and ball clamps and being slowly teased All sense of time and self become very fluid.
Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?
Other than going to a pro Dom in the past, I have been involved in bondage only with my wife who prefers the Dominant side. I introduced BD into our sexual life 20 years ago. Over the years sessions have only become more elaborate and intense. We have tried many things and now after 20 years we have reached a point where the sessions are so intense that we don’t need to go further. I would say definitely yes that she was tolerant, accepting, and most of the time willing to try new stuff. Thankfully...
Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.
As a young teenager, I experimented a little with self bondage using scarves for tying my legs and another for a gag.
One time, after being in chastity for a week, I was crossdressed, bound and tightly gagged with one of your harness panel penis gags. I was then sensually whipped for a while where I was literally crying with no tears from sheer bliss. Caned 30 strokes. After that I was rolled onto my back, clamps placed on balls and nipples with a cock ring with prickers, I was then edged for what seemed like forever…. The moaning, screaming and crying into the penis gag and the sudden release of orgasm… Thereafter, I orally satisfied my wife 3 or 4 times.
What is the most creative safeword you have ever used?
Only time a safeword was used was when I went to a ProDom a few times before my wife and I started doing bondage at home. We do not use safewords since we have figured out ways for my wife (the DOM) to know if there is a problem
What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?
Being in bondage for me is about intense stimulation and profound and complete sexual relief. Being stimulated and restrained and being taken to higher levels of sexual frustration is better than any drug. All senses can be stimulated including the sense of smell. The combination of the oral, anal, and genital stimulation while being in Bondage and crossdressed sets me free. There is only one situation where I feel almost as free and that is with running up a mountain with the smells of a pristine forest and the sounds of wild water running
And of course BD improves the lines of communication between my wife and me. When I don’t "behave" well during day-to-day life my punishment is no bondage and no BDSM for weeks.
What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?
It is important first off to have a good relationship with your partner, and be able to trust them. You must be able to communicate clearly about sex before you can start to explore sexual fantasies including bondage. Without first establishing a relationship where partners feel safe with each other, bondage should not be an option. There are plenty of resources to learn more about BDSM such as books, the Internet, seminars, parties, and other people into BDSM, etc. And then start slowly.... And talk about the experiences after likes dislikes wants etc. Being able to trust your partner especially when you are out of control is very important.
What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?
The PVC and or leather penis gag trainer. Why? For me one the best parts of the bondage experience, is to be firmly gagged. Being gagged is very orally stimulating for me. With the gag tightly in place, I have the freedom to moan and scream as loud as I want and the only thing emerging from the gag are unintelligible noises. It also helps lead to electrifying orgasms.
What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?
Would love to be cross-dressed, bound and gagged and forced to satisfy 2 dominant females.