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Meet Kalpar

Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?

Well I try to spend at least an hour every day reading something, although I don't get as much time to read as I'd really like. When I finish a book, I usually blog about it and say what I thought about it. On the weekends I like to play tabletop games with my friends or go to steampunk events in town. 

When did you first realize you were into bondage?

As hokey as it may sound, I think I was one of those people who just sort of always were into it but didn't realize that it was a thing and I say that because I remember having some very specific fantasies about rescuing chained up damsels when I was very young. When I was about fifteen or sixteen I got exposed to the world of the internet and found out that BDSM in general and bondage in particular were an entire subculture and my reaction was basically, ''Oh, that's a thing? Yeah I could totally do that.'' 

How you best describe yourself and why?  Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn. 

I think I'm going to have to go with Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn because I'm not really sure what I am anymore. I thought I was just a Dominant and then my girlfriend tried leading me around on a leash and I really enjoyed that so I was like, ''Maybe I'm a switch or maybe I'm not? I don't know anymore!'' So yeah, we'll go with Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn for lack of a better term.

Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional?  (please elaborate)

I'd say it's more physical for me than emotional; I like tying or locking people up and have recently learned some of the fun of being locked up myself, but it's not like a deep emotional thing for me. I know there are a lot of people out there who put a ton of significance in giving up control to their partner and it has this deep symbolism, but for me it's just a fun hobby for the bedroom. And both of those approaches are fine! Everybody's going to have something that works for them and who am I to judge?

Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?

My girlfriend has been very accepting of me including bondage in our relationship, but she's admitted it's not something she's crazy about. Fortunately she's been super awesome, understanding, and supportive of me meeting other people to play with outside our relationship. She's literally the best. 

Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.

There was a collar, some handcuffs, and the backseat of my car and that's all this gentleman's going to tell of that story.  ;)

What was your best bondage experience?

Probably that experience I mentioned before where my girlfriend led me around on a leash and it just felt right somehow and made me question everything I'd sort of assumed about myself.

What is the most creative safeword you have ever used?

Candy Cane 

What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?

Doing what feels right and what feels fun. 

What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?

Read. Explore. Research. Find out what interests you, but more importantly find out what doesn't interest you. And never, never feel bad for saying no to something you're not comfortable doing. If they won't respect your limits they're not worth your time. 

What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?

Definitely the black Dressed for Sex leather collar, wrist, and ankle cuff set. I started out with the wrist cuffs and liked them so much that I had to get the rest of the set. Now I've been getting hardware to use them in new and interesting ways. 

What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?

I would definitely like to receive a lap dance from a girl who's on a leash, sort of ala Jabba the Hutt. What can I say? I like leashes. 

 What’s your favorite knock-knock joke?

Well it isn't a knock-knock joke but it's a groaner:

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh.

What is Eskimo ice?

I honestly haven't a clue.