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Meet Layla

Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?

I work in IT as a network administrator. We have a couple dogs, a couple bikes - no Harleys and I'll ride my own, thank you - and I play a couple instruments.

When did you first realize you were into bondage?

At the age of eleven, though maybe even earlier. Although I didn't actually realize what the feelings were until I was older. I was always tying slipknots in ropes and playing with scarves for blindfolds when I was quite young. And my Barbie loved being captured by GI Joe.

How you best describe yourself and why?  Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn. 

Definitely submissive.  I wonder if that's fairly common when you have a highly responsible job - you want the opposite, to have even the option of being accountable eliminated.  You feel like you have freedom to explore things you might not otherwise have dared to do, but I'm not quite sure why being restrained removes those inhibitions.

Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional?  (please elaborate)

The feeling of being restrained is almost intoxicating. Is that physical or emotional?  I'm going with physical.

Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?

Not exactly. Reactions the first few times I made suggestions ranged from disgust to ridicule. I figured that it wasn’t normal to even wonder about such things, so I kept it buried for years. 

Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.

I'll tell you about the first experience with my husband.  We were going through a rough spot.  Couples fight - I'm being honest here.  At some point in the argument, which by then was about everything, he yelled - and sex is boring!  Well, that was certainly true. I picked up some lingerie, a lacey dress mostly holes, with these little elastic and ribbon wrist restraints.  We were at a conference a few days later and I shocked him in the hotel room by appearing in said dress.  After a few minutes I asked him to tie the ribbons together behind my back, got on my knees, and - well, PG 13 right?  Anyway, a few days later he mentioned the events in the hotel - another shocker, not a topic we would ever talk about later. Turns out he was very enthused about the whole thing. Google led me to the Sub Shop, and now I have a collection of pretty things!

What was your best bondage experience?

A recent evening involving a schoolgirl outfit, a blindfold and a spreader bar totally tops the list at the moment. 

What is the most creative safeword you have ever used?

At the moment I can't envision any scenario where we'd need one...

What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?

That both participants are enjoying it, and getting something out of it. Sometimes on a particular day it might be more for one or the other, and that's fine.

What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?

You'll work things out as you go.  You can make suggestions with the understanding that if we don't like it, we don't have to do it again. 

What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?

Oooh I love the 4 1/2" Violet Obsession posture collar!  Actually I love the whole set.  Well, actually any posture collar. With the wrist cuffs attached to the ring at the front... and a blindfold...  sorry what was the question?

What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?

A gag is definitely on my wish list - no! We really haven't tried that yet.  And a paddle... there is a pretty black one with shiny rivets... I'm SO getting that Robin outfit next! 

What’s your favorite knock-knock joke?

Hmm.  IT people are not really known for being funny.  How about a haiku?  I think this is pretty funny:

Windows crashed again.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

What is Eskimo ice?

No idea and Google failed me.