Meet Melissa

Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?

I’m a restaurant manager. It’s a job that keeps me busy and constantly on my feet. Most people’s off days are our work days.

When did you first realize you were into bondage?

It was during my junior year of college. I was working with a groupmate for a research project. Our relationship became friendly quite fast. We were also flirting a lot. It took months for us to become intimate. I made the first move. It was in her dorm room. I blindfolded her. She was tickled pink and didn’t expect it, but she was very aroused. I did tell her I was going to tie her up. She agreed. It helped that I whispered it into her ear. I used her sheets because those were the only things available. She didn’t know what I was going to do. Her anticipation mixed with confusion excited me.

How you best describe yourself and why? Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn.

I am a female dom. I’m not into inflicting pain. I want to be the one in control. I’m the one who is more active in leading the activities so to speak.

 

Meet Melissa
Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional? (please elaborate)

 

Emotional control turns me on more than physical. I get a kick out of being able to decide what one feels, and how one behaves. I do ask my sub what she’s interested to do and what she can handle before we start. But the instance we begin, I am in charge of what’s going to happen.

Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?

It depends on the lovers whom I ask. The ones that accepted my interest were those who enjoyed my kink and were into it too. There were some who didn’t like it one bit and I respect that. Hey, some like peanut butter while others are just allergic to it so bad they wouldn’t touch it even if they were paid to. I get that and I hold nothing against them.

Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.

It was with the group mate I was working with in college. We were friends but I wanted to kick our relationship up a notch. So I initiated us getting intimate. We were playing around in her dorm room. I blindfolded her. She was surprised, but I was more surprised when she didn’t refuse. I started kissing her in places she least expected. She was tiltillated the same way I was. I whispered in her ear that she was doing very good and that I was going to tie her hands now. She nodded her head. She enjoyed as I undressed her, kissed and touched her. She was thrilled that she didn’t know what was coming. Eventually, we both came, no pun intended. She would have made a great sub but the relationship didn’t last.

What was your best bondage experience?

It happened just a few months ago. My partner and I have been using sex toys to make our moments more fun. I recently discovered sub-shop’s elastic bondage wrap and I couldn’t get enough of it. My sub-partner loves being bound. I love that look of thrilled expectation on her face when she doesn’t know what’s coming. Oh! Blindfolds too are a must! We can’t not have it in the bedroom.

What is the most creative safe word you have ever used?

Donuts. I love donuts.

What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?

Communication. Being bound is a consensual act that needs both parties’ agreement. As a dom, I make sure I know what I can and can’t do with my sub. Similarly, my sub tells me her threshold and what she wants done. We go from there. The rest is spontaneity. But we need to know what both of us want and don’t want to happen.

What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?

Always prioritize safety. Know what your sub can handle. Keep your activities fun, practical and realistic. Rein in your desires and emotions. Doing so keeps both you and your sub enjoying time together more. No sense doing anything if you and your partner are not safe.

What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?

The multiple orgasm bondage vibrator harness is a fun toy to play with. I love seeing my sub squirm in pleasure at having multiple orgasms, and then cringe at the pain of having too much of it. Using this when she’s blindfolded is double the excitement as I get to do other things with her as the vibrator does its way with her too.

What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?

I want to try the strap on dildo on my sub. She gave me the idea to try it out. She saw the product on sub-shop and I’m planning to buy it. My sub is detailed enough to list down the things she wants me to do to her using the strap on dildo. I’m approving and disproving the things I like and don’t like. So far, I also like what she likes so it’s going to be a go.

Have you ever tipped a cow?

I did. He won’t accept it though, so I just gave it hay.

Have you ever been stung by a bee?

Oh god, no. I hope I won’t ever.

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