Coming out as crossdresser creates a before and an after in a relationship, specially if its an old relationship. Ideally, a man should talk about it with his partner beforehand, instead of the wife finding out on her own (walking on one’s partner dressed as a woman is definitely quite a shock). Either way, for a woman is highly surprising to learn that her partner is inclined towards those tendencies and chances are they don’t know how to react and how to respond. Most women can feel confused, scared or maybe betrayed by their partner, and that is completely understandable because it’s quite a big change.
But there is a silver lining, so don’t fret sweetheart! Most couples need to go over a counselor to guide them through these changes and to help them explore their emotions. This way, the relationship can come out stronger than ever. In the meantime, here are a couple of tips that can help you in the process.
- Express your feelings: If is an old relationship where the man discovers his desires to be as a crossdresser, it’s normal for the woman in that partnership to have some feelings regarding that decision. There may be some concerns regarding that new aspect of their partner and how that will affect the relationship, which are completely normal reactions. That’s why you should talk about how you are feeling and express any concerns or repressed emotions about it.
- Sexuality: In a heterosexual relationship, the woman is sexually attracted to a man, with the sexual characteristics that implies. When a man is a crossdresser, he will not only look as a woman but will also act like one…See where I’m going with this? Their sexual life may change, so it’s extremely important to discuss beforehand how the crossdressing will affect them in the bedroom. The important thing here is that both parties can have a successful and fulfilling sex life.
- Don’t forget! Most men find their newfound role as women a bit time consuming and can spend way too much time exploring that aspect, again completely normal (everything is shiny and new!). This is obviously fine, just don’t forget about your partner. She is still a woman that needs your attention, wink*.
- Ignore the prejudices: Everyone has prejudices and pre conceived notions, right? It’s normal to have them because we are, well, humans (you’re not a robot that is reading this, right? Wink*). So, when your partner comes out as a crossdresser it may be hard to deal with those preconceptions, so give yourself some time to get used to it. As for the men, allow your partner to process things and give them some time! No pressures here.
- Redefining your roles: It’s important to have well defined roles in the relationship so that each person has their identity very clear. Talking about it will always be the best path.
- Explore and set the boundaries: Crossdressing comes in many forms, so it’s important for the man to discuss with their partner what exactly is they love about it. Just as well, what crossdressing means for them and what exactly is they are interested in trying and exploring about the lifestyle. This will help the woman understand and deal with his man’s new lifestyle.