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Picture Perfect - Identifying Your Sub’s Interests

People have a wide variety of tastes. And for BDSM, finding that flavor is even more important. Figuring out what you like can take time but it is a necessity. If you don’t know who you are and what you like, it will be almost impossible to have a good bondage experience.

When you figure out what you like and what you need in a BDSM partner, you need to start looking for someone. That is why I mentioned how important is to figure out what you like: you need to know what you enjoy in order to look for someone who can match with you and has those same tastes.

Once you have met a possible partner (someone who wants to explore the same things as you do and who is willing to try them with you specifically), it’s time to know what you will be dealing with. And with this, I’m talking about what type of submissive you have on your hands. Yes, just like fishes in the sea there are plenty of them as well, wink*

Just as dominants have particular tastes, subs are no different. They can be put into several general categories, ranging from those who love the bondage equipment to those who love to receive pain. Most submissives fall into one or a mix of these two big categories. You can always try to ask them straight away what attracts them or what is it they crave, but sometimes they are not able to answer that easily. And here is when you come into play: if someone can’t put exact words as for what they like, you need to figure out in some other way or method.

It’s important to know them in order to create the scenes; you need to know what they crave exactly for them to be completely enjoyable. Here are some ‘tells’ that can give you an idea, such as:

  • If this person has a particular fetish with a material or with a particular item, like gags for instance, they are probably gear or equipment submissives. This type of submissive will probably request some item in particular for you to include in scenes.
  • If your partner seems to be really interested in you, is always aware of your presence and called you sir or miss since the very start, there are high chances they are slaves. They love to serve you well, being your slave and attending to your commands.
  • If they crave and you see their eyes twinkle when you hit them with a paddle or flogger, they love those endorphins that flow when they receive pain.
  • If they ask to be tied up or even mummified, they probably love being restricted. For them, the joy of bondage comes when they don’t have any control.
  • If they simply love bondage games or scenes, they probably just do it for the bondage and everything that entails. Chances are they also love to watch bondage videos or magazines.
  • If they are constantly craving intensity, most times even in other areas of their lives, they love intense play and scenes. These subs are probably adrenaline junkies and love living on the edge.

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