Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?
I’m just a normal guy in his late 20s who works a lot, plays video games, likes playing board games with friends, and finding the best Asian food. No one would suspect that I’m interested in bondage and very few even know about my hidden hobby.
When did you first realize you were into bondage?
I suspect it was the first day of kindergarten but of course, as a five year old, I had no idea at the time.
The school had one of those half walls surrounding the kindergarten playground. As I was walking up, terrified to be at a new school, I noticed a group of kids chasing each other. A little redhead girl got caught by one of the boys so she went and sat down against the wall with her arms up acting like they were chained to the wall. Picture the dungeon scene in Aladdin. It had to be that moment because I can picture it like it was yesterday.
Growing up I didn’t really watch TV at home but whenever we traveled I always tried to watch Scooby Doo. I hoped to catch my favorite episode called Mystery Mask Mix Up where Daphne was kidnapped, tied up, and gagged by bad guys.
It wasn’t until middle school when we ditched dial up and I was able to search the internet for tied up girls. Eventually I discovered Lorelei’s Bedroom Bondage and I finally realized what exactly I was into.
How you best describe yourself and why? Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn. Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional? What does BDSM mean to you: is it a lifestyle, a diversion, or something else?
I’ll roll my answer to all three of these questions into one.
I wouldn’t really describe myself as “interested in BDSM.” I just enjoy bondage. I like seeing girls tied up and gagged. I like being tied up and gagged myself. I like bondage during sex. I like bondage without sex. I also like sex without bondage.
I suppose that means I’m a switch, my desire for bondage is physical, and it’s something other than a lifestyle or a diversion.
Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?
I’ve had two long term girlfriends - one in high school and one in college. Both were more experienced than me when it came to sexual experiences however neither knew anything about bondage. I brought it up about four months into each relationship. At first they were surprised but after we started actually doing it they both were definitely WAY into it. That was awesome.
Interesting side note, in high school I obviously wasn’t allowed into an adult store and I didn’t have a credit card. So, as a resourceful teenager, I built my own trainer ball gag custom fit to my high school girlfriend. I spent a few hours at the arcade to win a jumbo bouncy ball, bought a few hardware rings from the local Home Depot, and bought an old purse from Goodwill so I could harvest a bunch of roller buckles. I made all the straps from a roll of special gaff tape I stole from my high school dance and theater department. We got a lot of use out of that awesome thing!
I’ve also been married once. She didn’t have any experience with bondage prior to our relationship but once brought it while we were dating, she got into it. One of our favorite games was Bondage Blackjack. The loser would either have to take off one item of clothing OR use one bondage item from our toy box. Generally those games would become a little one sided because it’s a little hard to stop someone from cheating when you’re frog-tied, ball gagged, and blindfolded!
Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.
My first bondage experiences were cops and robbers tie-up games with my neighborhood friends and cousins.
What was your best bondage experience?
I’ve had a lot of great bondage experiences. One of my favorites was for my birthday a few years back. After dinner my (now ex) wife and I went to Fascinations and bought a few things. She spent most of the evening in a plaid miniskirt, 5 inch heels, a big black ball gag, and a karada box tie. Best. Birthday. Present. Ever.
Later that night we both ended up with severe food poisoning from the shrimp at dinner which was horrible at the time but hilarious looking back on it!
What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?
It’s okay to ignore the D, S, and M parts of BDSM. That’s what I do. Just be into what you want to be into.
What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?
It’s really hard to pick because I’ve been happy with everything I’ve purchased. Right now my favorite for me is the 2 inch Leather Ball Stretcher Strap and my favorite for her is the Pink Premium Hush Silicone Ball Gag Harness. The only bummer is the back has one strap instead of two.
What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?
I can’t really think of one specific sensual fantasy that I haven’t lived out yet. However, now that I’m single, I can think of a small handful of friends and old coworkers who I’d definitely be interested in exploring some bondage fun with!