Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?
Nothing really interesting to tell. I do freelance work. I’m married to a wonderful woman who is happy to play damsel in distress when I play villain. We have a dog and a cat and we both enjoy reading and watching TV/movies. We love sci-fi, thrillers, steampunk, superheroes, and various combinations of those things.
When did you first realize you were into bondage?
My first strong impression was in like the 3rd grade, when Brenda Starr appeared bound and gagged in a Sunday comic strip (this was also the first time I’d ever seen the phrase “bound and gagged”). I couldn’t take my eyes off that strip; I wound up swiping it and saving it for a while when my folks threw out the paper. Around the same time, one of our local TV stations was showing reruns of The Adventures of Superman and Batman after school and another showed The Avengers on the weekends. I realized that the episodes where Lois Lane, Batgirl, Emma Peel, and Tara King got tied up and gagged instantly became my favorites. This was also about the time I started reading comics and detective stories, so it was like a perfect storm of bondage imagery and I was hooked.
How you best describe yourself and why? Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn.
Dominant, no question.
Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional? (please elaborate)
Probably a little of both. Even when I don’t get a physical response to a particular bit of bondage, I still appreciate the beauty of it; to some degree it’s almost like a type of artwork. And even the best bondage imagery is enhanced for me when I feel an emotional connection. That may be why I like bondage within a storyline; often when looking at a single image I try to imagine the storyline: Who did this to her? Why? How does she feel about it?
What does BDSM mean to you: is it a lifestyle, a diversion, or something else?
It’s just a thing, I guess. It’s a part of my life that I share with some and keep private from others. The analogy that I’ve used in the past is that my love of bondage is like my love for chocolate. It’s just part of my life that makes me happy.
Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?
Kind of a mixed bag. One girl I dated let me tie her up on occasion, but didn’t really like it. Another expressed an interest, but we wound up breaking up before we got around to it. My wife and I were both interested when we met, so it was a perfect match. Along the way, I also had a few female friends who allowed me to practice on them, which was fun.
Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.
Kind of tame … I had been planning it with the girl I was seeing at the time. Then, one night she was over and we were watching TV and playfully fighting about what to watch. Every time my back was turned, she’d snatch the remote and change the channel. When I felt we’d reached the appropriate level of playfulness, I said I’d had enough and got the rope that I’d previously put in a nearby drawer. I bound her wrists together in front of her and wrapped the remainder around her torso. I used a shorter piece to tie her ankles together and then tied a strip of cloth over her mouth. Then I put on what I wanted to watch and held her while we watched the show.
What was your best bondage experience?
There are so many, but the one that immediately comes to mind was the night I was out at a meeting. When I came home, I was surprised that my wife wasn’t watching TV in the living room. So I went into the bedroom and she was wearing my favorite black nightie and had cuffed herself to the headboard. Best homecoming ever!
What is the most creative safe word you have ever used?
Pass.
What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?
I think of bondage as a game as much as anything else. So, I think the most important thing is that everyone is having fun. Sorry it’s not a more interesting answer!
What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?
I really wish I had some great insight to offer here, but it’s pretty basic. Communicate with your partner. Plan it out. Take your time. And enjoy yourself.
What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?
We’ve liked everything we’ve gotten from the Sub-Shop, so it’s hard to pick. But the leather wrist cuffs we have are the thing we use the most. And I didn’t think I’d like the stuffed bit gag because I’m normally not a fan of bit gags; we ordered it because my wife thought it looked interesting. But instead of a normal bit gag, it looks more like a thick cleave gag, which I like. And it keeps my wife nice and quiet…
What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?
My wife & I have talked about doing some outdoor bondage, but we never have. And, to be honest, I’m not sure we ever will.
Can crop circles be square?
Hey, it’s the 21st century. Anyone can be whatever they want! So, why not?
If you had to be trapped in a tv show for a month, which would you choose and why?
Most of the shows we watch/enjoy are sci-fi or in the action/thriller genre. So, if I were to be in one of those, unless I could take the hero’s place, I’d probably be the character that gets killed right before the 2nd commercial break to show how serious the situation is. So if I had to be there a full month, I’d probably pick something like “Friends,” where it’s safe. I could hang out in the coffee shop and look at the girls for a month, I think.
