The best thing about bondage sex is, well, the bondage.
Regardless of what level you choose for participation in BDSM role playing, chances are that bondage will play a part. In fact, it is often the first thing that people explore when they are interested in taking things to a kinkier level.
But before you get all tied up in the fun of bondage, you want to take a little time to learn about restraints, how to use them properly and what kind of options you have. That's what this handy little beginner's guide is going to teach you.
- Safety Safety
If you have read any of my other articles then you aren't surprised that safety is first on my list. If you haven't then you will learn quickly that I am a huge advocate on having fun, but having fun in a way that doesn't harm anyone.
Is it possible to have harm and injury from restraints? Absolutely. That's why you have to use caution. So what are some things you can do to keep yourself or your partner safe while being bound?
- Never make the restraints too tight. Two fingers is a good judge. You want the bound person to enjoy it, not lose all feeling to their body.
- Don't use any restraints on someone with a medical condition that makes it dangerous.
- Always prepare with a safe word and plan of action.
- Don't move too fast. Some things have to be learned and understood before practiced.
- Don't keep the restraints on too long and always make sure there is still circulation.
- Make sure to have an emergency kit and a phone nearby, just in case.
- Choose your Restraints
Most are shocked by the choices available in restraints. There are things that would surprise even the most avid bondage fan. But for those who are novice to the idea, it's best to choose from some safer and more standard restraints.
Some of my personal favorites for beginners include:
If you choose to go more advanced you can try out things like body harnesses, spreader bars, straight jackets, and even rope.
- Keep the Blood Flowing
One of the biggest mistakes that people make is ending things too soon. A sub that has been restrained for a long time will often be sore and stiff. If left alone, she will eventually recover. But why do that?
Instead you want to massage her, help move the blood and get her circulation back into gear. Not only will this help her to alleviate her own problems, it adds an extra bit of role playing to an already exciting time. You can bond further and allow for that softer moment to showcase a different side of yourself to the sub.
- Tone it Down
When you are just starting out you don't want to take your bondage sex all the way. It would be far too easy to make a mistake if you began to try everything. So there are some things you want to reserve until you are more experienced, have been trained and have a plan in place for any type of danger. Those things include:
- Leave them for after you know how to handle a bad situation when a safeword can't be spoken.
- Suspension bondage. This requires real training.
- Extended bondage. Start with small amounts and allow yourself to work your way up to what you really want.