Sensuality vs. Sexuality – Why Sensuality is Important in Sex
Sensuality and sexuality are distant cousins. Though they are related because they somewhat share the same bloodline, the two offer different definitions. Sensuality is the more exciting part of intimacy. It is where the possibilities of potential chemistry begins. This is signaled by a knowing look, maybe a wink or two, and a slight touch.
Tilting the head sideways is a signal of openness and interest. Speaking and conversing starts the ball rolling. Getting to know someone’s mind through oral communication amps up the sensual vibe you’re giving out. Possible partners react to these signals and similarly give back the ooh-la-la vibe you’re projecting. Why? Because we all have built-in sensual energies coursing through our veins.
Eventually, sensuality leads to the more straightforward phase of the natural mating process – the expression of one’s sexuality. This energy is focused on the fulfillment of one’s pleasures, sexual needs, and desires. It is what humans do to feel good!
Sexuality is sensuality in action. It is all about the physiological and physical manifestations of passion. Frankly honey, sexuality can exist without sensuality. But why would you want that? Why would you only want to experience sexuality when you can definitely have both?
Though you can experience pleasure in sexuality, it would only be a kind of surface-level satisfaction. It would come from the drive to release a pressure stuck inside the body. It is similar to a scratch wanting an itch. You may have fulfilled removing the itch, but that is all there is to it.
But sensuality adds more layers to intimacy other than the physical. Actually, it is sensuality that makes the sex act intimate. When all our senses are involved, including the mind and heart, pleasure is amped up. Before the sex act even starts, it is sensuality that does the work of threading together sexual energies prior to physical touch and contact.
If you are in it for the long haul, it is sensuality that will keep you company. It is the tie that binds you and your partner to a life filled, not with mindless groping and grabbing but,in-depth va-va-va-voom love-making.
Sometimes though, it is sensuality that is left out in the cold. Please don’t ever do this. Why?
When you take sensuality for granted, your acts and desires would come from your loins. You could only go far with your physical desires. Eventually, sexuality alone would make your lover feel confused or wanting more. You might even wonder why your lover won’t want to be touched by you anymore.
Sensuality is not equal to sex. But if you encourage and nurture sensuality in your relationship, expect its effects to have a relevant impact not just to your sexual life but to your overall relationship.
You can nurture sensuality by being very aware of your environment. What do you see, hear, smell, touch, taste? What do you feel? What does your lover feel? Appreciate everything that comes through your senses. Know what it is that your lover perceives. Sensuality is not limited to the bedroom. It covers all aspects of your lifestyle, from eating, dressing, running, dancing, feeding the cat, walking the dog, etc.
Everything becomes a sensual experience if you are just as immersed in your intent to give pleasure as well as receive it. This is what sensuality is all about. You may even describe it as another manifestation of love. Sensuality comes from one’s being. It is not forced or conjured from a definite set of process. It simply exists. It is there and all you have to do is see its presence and allow it to come to you – and expect to come (wink, wink!) too.
When you become a sensual person, you also engage with the world on a sensual level. Eventually, you get to fall head over heels in love with life. A sensual life is a life of love. You become open to new experiences. You welcome new people in your life and is accepting of everyone. You do not judge others or yourself. You are simply present.
Sensuality is freeing. It liberates you from the demand of your lust and gives you tons of space to sit with your desires and befriend it, not be imprisoned by it. It is you who has control of your sexual life not some deep-seated physical want.
You get to live in the moment whatever that moment calls you for. You can easily stare at your lover’s eyes, or touch your lover’s lips, caress your lover’s skin, kiss your lover’s cheeks, without the pressing need to slither your way into your lover’s mouth or go down south immediately. It is not just about the fulfilment of your or the other’s sexual needs, it is about feeling mutually appreciated andloved.
Sensuality goes the slow and sure way. It is not in a hurry. Sensuality invests in time. It requires knowing first what it is you love and like, so as to make healthy decisions to care for and appreciate what others love and like. You need to have a stable and sensualrelationship with yourself first so you can adequately give and receive stability and unbridled sensuality to your lover. Plus, it is a healthy way to be.
When you have finally come to terms with living out your sensuality, and you are aware on how to properly express your sexuality, it is inevitable that you will have a mutually enjoyable and loving relationship not just with your partner but also with life in general.
