What name would you like your interview to appear as? (we are always highly discreet!)
"Nom dePlume"
Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?
I've been diagnosed with "Manic-depression with hypo-mania"; you can't Imagine what the mood swings have done to my life. Please don't tell me to "get over it"; as well tell a woman to "get over" her menstrual cycles. (Hers 'only' starts at menarche and ends at menopause; mine started at age six and is for life.) It's a chemical imbalance of dopamine and serotonin; doctors still aren't sure if it's not enough produced, to few receptors, or the receptors not responding.
When did you first realize you were into bondage?
Second year of High School I saw pictures of women scuba diving. Playboy was nice, but it was the wet-suits, respirators and masks I found 'interesting'. Especially the Kirby-Morgan style mask/helmet.
How you best describe yourself and why? Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn.
75% Submissive, 25% Dominant. Sometimes I just want to tie her to the bed and enjoy driving her wild; feasting on her body, and giving her orgasms.
Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional? (please elaborate)
Emotional. I want the feeling of being constrained, the compression and isolation. I use bondage as therapy - when The World is to much to handle, when my depression is out of control, when I just need a self-hug - I start adding layers and bindings. I can't affect the world, but I can myself.
My normal, everyday wear is PU catsuit, 5 1/2" stiletto crotch boots (black patent), 34" leather corset (to 36"), leather opera-length gloves, and cuffs locked on everywhere with a 12" hobble-chain. I usually wear this for eight hours (noon to 20:00), sometime longer; once for twenty-four. Sometimes I add a 3 1/2" posture collar; it's all quite comfortable. I nap wearing a blindfold, Israeli gas mask and nylon hood in addition; occasionally the rubber 2" collar.
What does BDSM mean to you: is it a lifestyle, a diversion, or something else?
It started as a diversion and became a lifestyle. It is turning into a near necessity for my well-being; I can gauge my mood by how much bondage I want. Unfortunately, I'm not as limber as I used to be.
Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?
Not at all, but she didn't react until after we were married. I started with the just the boots to gauge her reaction. The corset was barely acceptable as a back-brace (which I needed). I hid everything else and didn't play until after our separation and divorce. Much of it had dry-rotted by then; I haven't tried anyone since.
Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.
High school; I scrounged up a heavy leather tool belt, regular waist belt, my bicycle chain and lock, some rope, and sock-and-bandanna gag. I put myself into a ball-tie; later, I did it in the bath without the belts. That way I could soak away the rope marks and ease the muscles. Apparently, I’ve always enjoyed breath-play.
What is the most creative safe word you have ever used?
Self-bondage only. "TANSTAFL" would be a good one. I read someone used "arglefraster".
What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?
Acceptance; this is how I am. Everyone's something. Naked girls are interesting, but put them in a rubber, or leather, suit! High heeled thigh-boots, corsets and cuffs are what turn me on (and long hair).
What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?
Take it slow and find your limits; mentally, physically, and emotionally. Practice self-bondage while carefully looking for a partner; and don't be surprised at how few are interested.
What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?
Rope. It's so versatile and adaptable. I can bind my legs together today; tomorrow make a chest harness. There are no notches that 'restrict' you to a certain tension either. Every time I wear the boots, I wrap some around my knees and thighs, externally increasing the compression.
I'm not interested in 'impact play' or 'heavy denigration', I've had enough (psychological) pain in my life already.
What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?
Gearing up with a loving female. Being with a tolerant, loving female!
Wearing ballet boots, leather straight-jacket and an air-restricted gas mask would be interesting, for a couple hours.
Is there anything else you would like to share with us such as advice, thoughts or a silly knock-knock jokes? We are all ears and ball gags.
World’s Worst Knock-knock joke:
"Knock, Knock."
"Who's there?"
"Doctor."
"Doctor who?"
Cue theme music...
I have found most of the people I associate with are at least non-judgmental when they see me dressed in gear. “Choose your friends wisely.” and “You are known by the friends you keep.”
