Coming out as a cross dresser to your partner can be both an exciting and terrifying moment at the same time. Whatever your specific case is, there is one thing that is true no matter the situation: the relationship dynamics will change. That is why it’s so important for you two to work things out and figure how to cope and how to keep a healthy relationship. The first thing, as usual, is my number one recommendation: be as honest as possible and be in constant communication with each other. I promise is possible to have a healthy and great heterosexual relationship as a crossdresser!
In can be somewhat challenging balancing work, kids (if you have them), chores, errands, and time to have sex and cross dress. So a little planning will be key. Don’t ever take your relationship for granted! Make sure that each of you takes time and effort into the relationship so it can continue to grow and evolve. Keep in mind trust is one of the most important things in a relationship, so if you can’t trust them or talk to them freely, it may be time to re-consider some things, if you know what I mean. And remember, if one of you, or you both are having trouble with the coming out part, go to therapy! It’s healthy, worth the investment and better in the long term, pinky swear. Remember we are not perfect and we need guidance plenty of times in our lives in order to be the best version of us and live a happy and successful life (ok, pep talk over, you can go on now)
You know how I’m always saying honesty it’s important? If your feelings or sexuality are changing over time, you need to let your partner know about them. This can range from wanting to explore other things, increase your boundaries or even thinking about transitioning, talk about it with your partner. As for the woman, consider and think if you are having any concerns or even pent up jealousy or resentment towards your partner to ensure you don’t blow up one day because your husband has better dresses than you. Both deserve to be in the best relationship you can! Consider the other person’s feelings, be open and remember they love you and care for you. And don’t forget to breathe, it will make things easier.
Try to have at least one night a week reserved to explore each other, either sexually and/or personally (talk about your feelings). That is why it is a good idea to have one day a week reserved for a date night. If you guys don’t have much time, you can make one day a week designed to explore physically and keep notes during the week for the other to read. Kind of like a diary where you are writing about your feelings, desires, concerns, expectations, etc. This can also make things easier if you are somewhat afraid or intimated of expressing things out loud; sometimes it’s easier to write down things on paper (or a text, or an e-mail,…) than voicing them, right? Scheduling ahead will also be key in order not to miss the opportunity, so write it down on your calendars or make it “Tuesday dates” or whatever works for you. Remember this whole process is about finding out what works for both of you and your particular relationship. Good luck.